Bicarb Quickie

This is a quick No Poo update. It is almost three weeks since I last washed my hair with shampoo and, contrary to my expectations, it feels soft, clean and not at all greasy. I want to make it clear that I would not be saying this if it was not true; I did not go into this expecting bicarbonate of soda to work.

My hair does feel a little different to how it used to. It is slightly heavier and fuller than it was after a normal shampoo. After two days without a wash it feels even heavier and thicker, but not as greasy as it would have done two days after a shampoo wash. The appearance of my hair is much the same as it always was, only now I don't have to use serum or blow dry it to get it to look smooth and nice. The biggest change is to my scalp. Previously it was dry, flaky and itchy. All of that has stopped now that I am not using harsh detergents on it.

My routine is currently: put bicarb mix on scalp (about 1/2 tsp bicarb to 1/2 cup water); massage and leave 2 mins; rinse well; squirt on some dilute cider vinegar (about 1 tsp to 100ml water); rinse. I am still doing this every two days. I have tried going longer but I don't like the heavy feeling of my hair; maybe I will be able to leave longer between washes as time goes on.

I am curious to see how things develop and if my hair changes further. The transition period is meant to last anywhere from two weeks to two months, so I might still be in it. I would urge anyone who has a passing interest in No Poo to give it a go because it really is so much less scary than I imagined, and if you have a sensitive scalp then it might be the solution you have always been looking for.

PS I'm going on holiday now so please don't think I'm rude if I don't respond to any comments for a while.

The Reality of Child Mortality

Have you noticed any of the recent articles on child mortality across the world? Here in the UK the headlines have told us that we have the highest death rate of under-5s in the whole of Western Europe, with 5.3 deaths per 1000 live births. That compares with Sweden's 2.7.

But the figures from other Americanised cultures are equally as bad: Australia had 4.7 deaths per 1000, Canada had 4.9 and the US had a shocking 6.7.

Child deaths are falling across the world, in developing as well as developed nations. But I still have to wonder why they are higher in American-type cultures than European countries. The reasons are obviously very complex but increases in obesity, fertility treatment and average maternal age are surely important factors.

Could the private American health system also be to blame for it's terrible child mortality? The UK's National Health Service is far from brilliant, but at least every mother has easy access to quality obstetric and paediatric care if it is needed.

Years ago, before the NHS was established, my great great aunt lost her two year old son to diptheria because she could not afford to take him to hospital. She never had another child and for the rest of her life she cursed herself for failing to save him. This is the reality behind child mortality.

Bicarbonate of Soda Actually Works

I was expecting to come out of the shower with hair as greasy as when I went in. But this week's revelation is: bicarbonate of soda does actually clean my hair.

I've used it twice so far and my hair feels pretty much normal. However I have two things going in my favour:

a) I only washed my hair every two days anyway, and I didn't use much shampoo; and
b) We have really soft water.

For anyone interested, I read around a few websites and decided to use a softly-softly approach to begin with. So I am only using one teaspoon of bicarbonate of soda mixed with a cupful of water (200ml to be precise). I pour about half of that on my head, massage it into the scalp for a couple of minutes then rinse. I thought I would gradually increase the dosage if it wasn't working, but so far it seems to be cleaning my hair well enough.

I still have a bit of conditioner left in a bottle so I've been using that after the wash. When it has run out I'll start experimenting with cider vinegar.

I keep wondering why I've been using shampoo for thirty years when that bicarbonate of soda sitting in the kitchen cupboard would do the job just as well. It's quite amazing.

Not Crunchy, Just Kind

I'm going ahead with the whole no 'poo thing. Under normal circumstances I would have washed my hair today but instead I gave it a rinse, so I suppose today counts as day 1. When it gets disgustingly greasy I'll get to grips with bicarbonate of soda and I might go to see if Holland and Barrett have any cider vinegar (though I'm not getting my hopes up since I live in one of the most un-healthfoody places in the country. In fact it's a wonder that our local one makes enough money to pay the rent, let alone make a profit).

But why, I find myself wondering, do I want to ditch the shampoo? What's my motivation? You see I'm not really your typical crunchy attachment parent (if there is such a thing). I'm not really very crunchy at all. Well, maybe just a little bit.

I think different people do crunchy things for different reasons. Some, like the blogger Maman a Droit, have found that religion has led them to live more in harmony with nature. In her profile she explains:

I try to do things naturally 'cause I think that's the way God designed them to run, so I come to a lot of the same conclusions as my liberal sisters!

Others might be motivated by general respect for nature and concern about the impact humans have on the planet.

Personally, I think I come from a more scientific angle. I want to live in the manner that my body is biologically adapted for. I just think that my body was designed to work a certain way and I will feel mentally and physically better if I allow it to live in that way. Furthermore, I am instinctively thrifty and I love any opportunity to save money. Crunchiness and frugality seem to go hand in hand.

Speaking of hair in particular, I look around at the other hairy animals that inhabit this planet and they all seem to have lovely coats despite not lathering themselves with detergent every two days. I'm pretty sure that humans haven't been doing it for more than a few hundred years either. I have no doubt that human hair can look good without being drenched in harsh chemicals on a regular basis so goddamn it, I'm going to give it a go.

This train of thought has got me wondering what motivations other people have for doing crunchy things. What's your story?

On a Slightly Different Note: Baby Toiletries

It is warm, finally. The sun is shining. Looking after my baby is getting easier and easier. I am getting excited about my breastfeeding counselling training and things are starting to fall into place around the peer support I am currently involved in. Life is good. So what is a formerly angst-ridden mother supposed to write about?

I have found my mind turning towards the old "no 'poo" thing. You know, no shampoo (the other thing would be unhealthy). Since Cave Baby was born we have probably washed her hair with shampoo about three times. I remember in our antenatal class the midwife told us not to bother with baby toiletries, so we took her literally and bought none. (This caused some consternation to the midwife who visited the day after the birth wanting to bathe Cave Baby and wash the blood off her head. She could not imagine not putting any products in a bath). Despite our shunning of hair products, Cave Baby has the softest, cleanest, most gorgeously baby-smelling hair. All we do is rinse it under the shower every three or four days, and we don't use any skin washing products on her either.

What I want to know is whether this clean un-shampooed hair phenomenon is a consequence of her being a baby, or whether it would work for me too? Will there come a time when her hair does become greasy and we have to resort to shampoo? I have mixed feelings about taking the no 'poo route with my own hair. I like the idea of saving money but on the other hand I take quite a lot of pleasure in shopping for a really yummy smelling shampoo and conditioner every few months.

Even if I don't wean myself off shampoo, I'm still keen to keep my baby product-free and I will try bicarbonate of soda-based concoctions if they become necessary. I'd love to hear of anyone else's experiences of keeping their babies shampoo-free.

On a slightly different but related point, does anyone have any good remedies for baby eczema? Despite our avoidance of soap and a daily slathering with aqueous cream, Cave Baby still has patches of red itchy skin. I have used hydrocortisone cream which does sort the problem out temporarily, but the eczema just returns when I discontinue using it.

For anyone interested in reading more about No 'Poo, there are loads of bloggers out there who have written about it but I can particularly recall Top Hat's no 'poo chronicles. And the post that inspired me to write this one was Joe's on here new blog Slightly Frugal. Sometimes Hippie. Always Busy.

Enjoy reading and please tell me if you've any advice for me.

Ovulation, Delaying Nursing and Some Other Stuff

This post is going to go into a little more detail than you may be used to about something that we don't often talk about: cervical fluid. But it's also about breastfeeding and how I'm getting on with delaying my daughter's nursing, so it's not all icky. Don't worry.

I'm still period-free after almost 20 months of breastfeeding and whilst I'm not worried about it, I would quite like to get back into the old routine some time before I hit the menopause. According to Sheila Kippley, 8% of ecologically breastfeeding mothers (that is those who feed on demand night and day, co-sleep and do not use any artificial nipples) go for over 2 years postpartum without having a period. So I'm not alone.

But the thing is that if you are one of those people who have a long amenorrhea, your cycles tend to need a bit of a kick to get them started again. Basically your body gets in a really nice groove with the constant flow of ovulation-suppressing prolactin and even if your baby feeds a little less and the prolactin decreases slightly, you don't necessarily ovulate. La Leche League suggest kick-starting ovulation by making an abrupt change such as avoiding breastfeeding for 24 hours. This gives your ovaries a break from the prolactin released during breastfeeding and allows them to raise you oestrogen level high enough to trigger ovulation.

I'm not going to do the 24 hour break thing because it wouldn't be fair on my daughter. But my body has been giving me signs that it is trying to ovulate, so I am hoping that if I help it out a little I will be rewarded with a cycle. Cave Baby's night-time sleep has improved a lot recently and she often wakes just once in the night, so I am already nursing less than I was. A small reduction in daytime nursing might be all I need to get my oestrogen level over that threshold.

So how do I know that my body wants to ovulate? Your cervical fluid (the stuff that your cervix makes and which makes a white patch on your pants) can tell you a lot about what is going on in your body. In a normal cycle you start by having a period then your vagina is fairly dry for a few days. As you approach ovulation your ovaries produce oestrogen in increasing quantities. The oestrogen causes your cervix to produce fluid. Most people will first experience sticky whitish cervical fluid, then a couple of days later it will become more lotiony like hand cream. Finally, a day or two before ovulation, the cervix makes a clear, stretchy fluid that is perfect for sperm to swim through. It's your body's way of making your vagina a welcoming place for sperm so that you are more likely to get pregnant.

If you are experiencing a period of anovulation like me, your cervical fluid does not follow the usual pattern. In fact I currently have sticky or lotiony fluid all the time, and it is this that tells me that my oestrogen levels are quite high. Sometimes it even starts to get a bit stretchy like true fertile fluid, but then I am required to sit through a nursing marathon and the ovaries are squashed back down again. I am obviously making a lot of oestrogen, but just not quite enough to cause an egg to be released. By the way, I know what my cervical fluid is like because most days I wash my hands then use them to feel for my cervix and take a sample of the fluid surrounding it.

So without wishing to do anything drastic like weaning, I'm just seeing if delaying nursing sessions will make a difference to me. I read all the advice on my last post and I think it helped me see that everyone reaches a point where they want to adjust the nursing relationship a little bit to fit around their lives more comfortably. And I am not reducing the amount of nursing we do purely to help me regain my fertility; it is also about my convenience since the frequent feeds were starting to become a nuisance. So at present I am not offering the breast (though I never have done; my little girl has never needed reminding to feed!) and when she asks for it, I am routinely offering food and/or a drink and/or a distraction to see if the breastfeed can wait. It has struck me how ironic it is that in the early days I was concerned that my baby should feed only when she was hungry and not just for comfort, whereas now I am avoiding the hunger feeds and trying to restrict myself just to the comfort ones!

In my head, I am now playing the part of the ewe who starts to kick her lambs away occasionally when they want to feed but she would rather walk to a juicy new bit of grass instead. Placing restrictions on nursing seems to be a perfectly natural thing to do at this stage in the breastfeeding relationship. I will give it a month or two and see how things go. I am not going to be worried if I do not ovulate in the next few weeks because I know it will happen eventually (she says, keeping her fingers crossed).

Have you any experience of altering your nursing patterns so that your body can resume monthly cycles? Or have you used fertility awareness to help you avoid or achieve pregnancy?

PS If you are reading Liz, I have finally read Taking Charge of Your Fertility and I thank you for the recommendation.

With Nipples Aflame

Have your nipples ever turned blue? Have they ever felt like they were burning from within? Have you ever had such intense nipple pain that you were unable to concentrate on anything except crossing your arms over your breasts to protect them?

Have you heard of Raynaud's phenomenon?

I suffered from Raynaud's for years, without realising what it was. I can recall one occasion when I was standing in London waiting for a coach, feverish with the start of flu and with nipples that burned so intensely that all I could do was walk round and round in circles with my arms wrapped around my chest to distract myself from the pain.

It's caused by cold, you see. Many are the times I have been found kneeling on the floor with my chest pressed up to a radiator in an effort to warm my breasts up and stop my nipples from screaming at me. I remember my grandad showing me his white, bloodless fingers when he went out in the cold, and that was also Raynaud's.

The Wikipedia entry for Raynaud's phenomenon says that it can cause discolouration of the "fingers, toes and other extremities". I guess my nipples come under "other extremities". It is caused by constriction of the blood vessels delivering oxygen to the affected part, and can be triggered by stress, cold and... you guessed it... breastfeeding. If you're sensitive to strange images of nipples, then look away now. But here, courtesy of Better Health's Weird Medical Problem of the Week, comes a picture of the bizarre colour changes that occur when a nipple undergoes an attack of Reynaud's:



If you're wondering, that's white, then cold, cold blue, then finally red as the blood flow returns to the nipple.

It seems that some women experience Raynaud's during and/or after breastfeeding. It can be confused with the pain caused by a poor latch, so may often go undiagnosed. I have been one of the lucky ones; I have not experienced the condition since giving birth, though it had worsened during my pregnancy. It could be that childbirth and breastfeeding have cured it, or it could return in the future. Maybe I'm not suffering because we are heating the house more generously than we did pre-baby.

Raynaud's probably affects loads of people, but it is not serious enough to warrant investigation or treatment and hence it remains fairly unknown. Medications to relieve it are available, but knowing what causes it and avoiding the triggers are probably the most sensible courses of action.

Has your breastfeeding been affected by any bizarre disorders? I hope not, but leave a comment if it has! And if you've not experienced Raynaud's, I hope you enjoyed the picture anyway!

A Mother's Christmas

Welcome, Carnival of Breastfeeding readers! December's carnival is all about keeping healthy during the festive period and there are (or shortly will be) links to the other wonderful posts at the bottom of this one. Enjoy reading them, and have a lovely Christmas time.

Christmas is a time for families to be together. We have always made an effort to spend time with our parents, brothers and sisters at Christmas, even if it meant that by the end of the holidays we were more exhausted than at the beginning.

Things were no different last year. I had a four month old baby, breastfeeding most of the time and waking me up at least every couple of hours through the night (in fact every hour is probably more accurate). But in those early days of motherhood I still believed that I should be trying to have it all. Yes, I should be taking it easy and spending lots of time nursing my baby, but I should also be cooking fantastic Christmas meals, hosting family at my house, making mince pies, buying gifts for everyone and generally being the life and soul of the party. So, as usual, we arranged a punishing Christmas schedule that would allow us to be all things to all men, as is expected at Christmas. We spent the big day and Boxing Day with my parents, then Cave Father's parents arrived to stay at our house; on the 28th we hosted a party for all the family, and the following days we continued to wait on our house guests.

It was about as far from "fun and relaxing" as you can get. We ended up absolutely exhausted, and Christmas felt more like an ordeal than a pleasure. Instead of enjoying ourselves, we longed for the time when our parents would go home and we could spend some time alone with our baby.

So we are determined that things will be different this year. But if we believe that Christmas is a family time, how can we balance our needs with the needs of our relatives?

Family means more than grandparents, aunts and uncles. Though it sounds strange to my ears, my partner, my daughter and I are a family unit now. Our family bonds needs nourishing, just like the bonds with our extended family. It is too much to expect a new mother to play host to her relatives as well as breastfeeding and caring for a baby. That is just a recipe for illness. So this year we are going to concentrate on nourishing the relationships within our tiny family. We are going to spend Christmas Day at home, cooking a small but (hopefully) perfectly formed Christmas dinner and going a bracing walk with Cave Baby in the backpack. We are going to visit my parents, but not push ourselves too hard by staying the night. We are going to see Cave Father's relatives at New Year, when there is less pressure to conjure up forced Christmas cheer. Above all we are going to put ourselves first for a change - not in a selfish way, but in a "we really just need a break" way. And we are even hoping that (whisper it) Cave Father and I might be able to have sex! Just think of it! After weeks of illness, colds, teething and worry, there has been precious little romance around here.

So here is my recipe for a new mother's healthy Christmas time. See your family, but let them do the cooking. Have guests, but only the ones who will help out around the house and won't complain about you sitting on the sofa breastfeeding all day. Space out the festive activities with luxurious time at home spent enjoying the family that you work so hard for all year.

Most importantly, make sure you make time for your baby and your partner, because the closest bonds are sometimes the ones that get forgotten at this family time.

Happy Christmas.

Photo from Daily Mail.

And while you're here, why not have a look at the other carnival posts:

Mama Knows Breast: A Breastfeeding Poem: Twas the Breastfeeder's Nighttime
Chronicles of a Nursing Mom: Don't Forget the Pump!
Blisstree.com's Breastfeeding 1-2-3: Breastfeeding and Dehydration
Accidental Pharmacist: Motherhood Statement
Hobo Mama: Breastfeeding and the holidays: How to take care of yourself
Motherwear Breastfeeding Blog: Taking Care of Yourself and Your Baby During the Holidays
Breastfeeding Moms Unite: Caring for a High Needs Baby During the Holidays
Breastfeeding Mums: Looking After Yourself During the Holidays: 7 Tips for Breastfeeding Mothers
Mommy News & Views: The Holidays And Being A Breastfeeding Mom
Happy Bambino's Blog: How to Take Care of Ourselves During the Holidays
The Adventures of Lactating Girl: Breastfeeding and Holidays

Thoughts On Weaning

In my last post I discussed how upset I was when my doctor told me I might have to wean my fifteen month old baby to allow me to take medication. One thing that really came through to me from the comments was the wide range of emotions that people have in relation to weaning.

Some comments implied that I would feel guilty about weaning; others simply that I would be sad. In reality, my anxiety stems from the prospect of changing the whole manner in which we look after our daughter: weaning would mean changing the way we sleep; the way we achieve calm after upsets; even the way we chill out when both of us need a little break.

For me, guilt doesn't come into it. I know my daughter has had a great start, and I know that she could manage perfectly well without any more breastmilk. I really hope that other people are not made to feel guilty when they wean. I believe that babies deserve to be nursed for as long as their mothers can manage, and after that they should be weaned with love and patience. For many people, modern life just isn't compatible with long term breastfeeding. Sometimes you just have to wean. Maybe you're going back to work, going on to medication or having another baby. Maybe you just want your breasts back. If it's a good enough reason to wean then you shouldn't be feeling guilty. Let's face it, if you choose to wean off the breast at six months, your baby will have been receiving breastmilk for longer than 97% of the babies born in Britain. You can't feel too bad about that.

Though I wouldn't feel guilty about weaning at fifteen months, I can't say that I feel a great sense of pride for making it this far. I have had it so ridiculously easy. It is the people who have battled cracked nipples, thrush, mastitis and pumping regimes that should feel proud - I just happen to have a baby who loves breastfeeding. I feel a bit uncomfortable when people congratulate me for nursing for this long. I've not done anything special. All I have done is what nearly every mother in the history of mankind has done.

Before I finish, there's just one caveat I have to put on this "Weaning is OK" message. I have never understood why breastfeeding mothers feel the need to replace their milk with formula at a certain age (often six months). They don't wean their babies off milk per se, but for some reason they think that their babies are too old to breastfeed. I watched several people with babies the same age as mine go through this, and I never figured out why they did it. Why spend money on powdered milk when the stuff that comes free out of your breasts is much better? Well OK, I think I know the reason really - they have read too many books that say you need to get babies off the breast early before they get used to it. God, don't you just hate western parenting "experts"?

All this is academic, because we are not weaning. But I would hate anyone to think that I disapprove of other people's decisions to wean, just because we have chosen to continue breastfeeding for an extended (or shall we say natural) length of time.

I Never Knew What Nursing Meant To Me...

...until I was told, today, that I might have to wean my baby.

It turns out that the digestive problems I have been having are something more serious than Irritable Bowel Syndrome after all, and a series of unpleasant tests and investigations will shortly be inflicted upon me to determine what is really the problem.

"If it is Inflammatory Bowel Disease, what's the treatment?," I asked.

"Well you can take medication, but you would have to stop the breastfeeding."

Oh thanks. To make matters worse, if they could be (and believe me, they could be really bad), I was then told that I was "making a rod for my own back" by co-sleeping and still breastfeeding at 15 months. Oh, the old classic line. First time anyone's actually said it to me - I suppose it had to happen sometime.

I know I should have been upset by the diagnosis (or lack of it) but what really cut me to the core was the prospect of having to wean my baby for a disease that doesn't even seem to affect me more than once a month or so (touch wood). This was what had me crying all day. I can't do that to my baby. It's just not what I want. I suppose I have got so used to the idea that we will be nursing for years yet and that I might even be tandem nursing a new baby one day. It all came crashing down in one horrible moment.

But since I have trained as a Breastfeeding Peer Supporter I have learnt a thing or two about breastfeeding and one thing I know is that lots of medications that doctors say can't be taken during breastfeeding actually can be taken. A cursory bit of internet research has revealed that sufferers of Crohn's disease and Ulcerative Colitis can have babies and can breastfeed, even when taking their medications (by the way, if you're reading this for information, please don't take what I'm saying as gospel. Research it further and if possible, ask a Lactation Consultant for advice).

What a fucking horrible day. All I can say is, at least I'm going to be able to sleep knowing that I probably won't have to wean. I say probably.

Pain Hammered My Blog

I find these "why I haven't posted in a while" posts a bit self-important. Does anyone really mind if I take a bit of time out? Of course not. But anyway, despite my reservations, here is one of those very posts.

I've been ill for a whole week. I'll spare you the details, but it started with me scratching at the door of A&E to get some pain relief from my stabbing abdomen, had an unbelievably uncomfortable middle phase where I was carrying more trapped wind than I thought possible, and is finishing (hopefully) with constant abdominal cramps and a fear of travelling too far from a toilet.

I've had similar attacks before so I'm going to try to take it really easy for a bit. If it is IBS then it is obviously related to stress and I need to keep that out of my life as much as possible. In other words, I'm going to try putting the kettle on and sitting back instead of diving for the computer the minute my daughter falls asleep. Maybe I'll post once a week for a while. Whatever. I thank anyone for reading, and I am sure nobody is particularly bothered how frequently I write!

In other (good) news, Cave Baby is walking really confidently on her own now. Although everybody had warned me that I would never be able to sit down again, I am in fact finding that things are much more restful than the last six weeks when I had been holding her hand ALL DAY. Walking seems to have brought slightly better sleep and a new found independence, both things that I am incredibly grateful for.

So, to rest and relaxation. A bientot.

Co-Sleeping in the News

A new study in the British Medical Journal has linked co-sleeping with Sudden Infant Death Syndrome. But read between the lines and it quickly becomes clear that, like all SIDS studies, there are many more factors at play than the fact that the deceased baby was sleeping with its parents.

For a start, it is a startling fact that among the 80 mothers of babies who had died, 25% had drunk more than 2 units of alcohol in the previous 24 hours. This compares to only 2% of mothers in a control group (though these figures may be skewed by the fact that the mothers of deceased babies were questioned at the weekend, when they were more likely to have been drinking). When drugs were also taken into account, the proportion of mothers of deceased babies who had been affected by drugs or alcohol climbed to 31%.

The finding that has hit the headlines hardest is that in 54% of the 80 cases of SIDS, the baby had been sleeping with a parent (which means that in 46% of the deaths, the baby was sleeping on its own). But this does not mean in a bed, safely adapted for co-sleeping. In fact 17% of the SIDS children had been sleeping on a sofa, versus 1% of the non-SIDS cases. The use of pillows was also found to be a statistically significant factor in the SIDS cases. I wonder how many more had been in a chair, sleeping on a parents' knee after a night feed where the parent had desperately tried to stay awake to avoid the terrible risk of taking the baby to bed.

Factors that were also found to be associated with SIDS, but which are less likely to be associated with co-sleeping were swaddling, maternal smoking during pregnancy, preterm birth, ill health, stomach sleeping and sleeping alone (not in the parents' room).

The presence of bedding over the head or face of the baby, a side sleep position, excessive bedding and clothing and postnatal exposure to tobacco smoke were not found to be associated with SIDS.

Tellingly, the researchers themselves said that co-sleeping should not be demonised. Their conclusions support what co-sleeping advocates have been saying all along: parents should be educated about safe co-sleeping before birth. That means not consuming alcohol or drugs prior to sharing a bed with a child, not smoking, not co-sleeping on a sofa or in a chair and not co-sleeping if the parents or the baby are very ill (though this is perhaps the occasion when our instincts make us more likely to bedshare). It also means keeping the baby next to its mum, having a safe sleeping environment with no dangerous gaps, keeping pillows and duvets away from the baby (which should preferably be on top of the covers with its own blanket, though I only did this for six months) and making sure the baby sleeps on its back (or possibly its side).

I know that having my baby in a cot in my room is in theory the "safest" sleeping arrangement. But I also believe there are positive benefits to sharing a bed, and my child would miss out on these benefits if she slept alone. It is very easy for the medical community to recommend using a cot, but the reality on the front lines of parenting can often make that a very difficult ideal to achieve. My daughter cannot usually be placed in a cot without waking, so cot sleeping would necessarily involve a lot of crying and that is not something I am prepared to inflinct on her. That is just my experience; it is possible that if she had been an "easier" baby, I would never have bedshared at all.

Cot sleeping became popular as bottle feeding went on the rise. Breastfeeding babies feed more frequently and for longer than bottle fed infants, and can only be fed by their mother. The night-time parenting of a breastfed baby is therefore easier if the baby co-sleeps some or all of the time. Co-sleeping is much more compatible with breastfeeding, and as breastfeeding numbers increase it is inevitable that more mothers will co-sleep (a recent study in the north-east found that 65% of breastfeeding mothers sometimes co-slept).

The NHS and UNICEF have not changed their advice to parents - cots are safest, but if you co-sleep, follow the above safety guidelines. Now, a study into SIDS where the co-sleeping babies were all doing it safely in a bed with responsive parents... wouldn't that be something?

Cow Colostrum - A Bit Wrong?

Is it just me, or is drinking cow colostrum a bit, well, icky?

The antibody and growth-factor packed first milk is the latest performance enhancing supplement for daft cyclists (including Olympic silver medallist Gustav Larsson).

I know it's really no different to drinking cow's milk, but I just can't get away from the feeling that it's a bit wrong. I mean, aren't the super antibodies and growth factors designed for cows not humans? And what about the poor calves?

If it's not speed then it's EPO. If it's not EPO then it's caffeine. Those cyclists just can't get enough of their freaky supplements. And if you're not a cycling fan, you will probably have no idea what I'm talking about.

Cow colostrum. Not for me thanks.

The Pill vs Fertility Awareness

Do you trust The Pill to keep you from getting pregnant without messing up your body? I don't. My last post on the effect of breastfeeding on child spacing got some thought provoking comments (particularly Earthenwitch's) about fertility awareness. Would we benefit from having more knowledge about our own fertility? It's a difficult question: a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, as the saying goes.

If you are a man or you don't like talking about cervical mucous then you might want want to look away now. So here goes. Several years ago I started taking the contraceptive pill; it just seemed to be the normal thing to do. Within the first year of taking it, I began to feel lethargic and sad. I took B vitamins in an attempt to combat my lack of energy, but they did not seem to make any difference.

My doctor seemed unconcerned about the side-effects but I did manage to persuade him to change my prescription to a different brand of pill. And I did begin to feel better, though I don't know whether it was the new pills or the placebo effect that made the difference. But over the next couple of years I found that my breasts became increasingly sore in the days before my "period" and my interest in sex diminished. This kind of defeated the whole pill-taking exercise.

I think I got off fairly lightly with my minor complaints; a quick web search reveals a list of side-effects as long as your arm, including:

* Weight gain (average of 10lbs in the first year)
* Increase or decrease in acne
* Nausea and vomiting
* Dizziness
* Headaches
* Depression
* Vaginal infections
* High blood pressure
* Loss of libido
* Blood clots in legs, lungs, heart or brain
* Stroke
* Liver tumors (rare)
* Heart attacks
* Gallstones (rare)
* Jaundice (rare)
* Possibly cervical cancer

One morning I woke up, came to my right mind and decided I had had enough of stuffing synthetic hormones down my neck. It is much easier to do this when you are in a stable relationship within which pregnancy would not be a disaster, and I would not for a minute encourage other people to come off the pill. But for several years before we conceived intentionally, I mentally tracked my fertility and used contraceptives only on the days when I was most likely to get pregnant. This is not too difficult when your cycles are regular like mine and it requires no more knowledge than A-level biology.

Disclaimer: NOBODY should trust their own contraception to the instructions in the following paragraph! It is a gross simplification of natural fertility awareness and I will NOT be held responsible for any unwanted pregnancies! With that clear, I shall continue. To avoid conceiving you basically need to know when you ovulate, and use barrier contraception before and after that day. You can easily find out when you ovulate by observing your cervical mucous for a few cycles. Ovulation is accompanied by a sudden increase in clear, stretchy mucous and if you don't see it when you go to the toilet then - yes girls - you just have an exploratory feel (you know where) and see what you can find (as a rough guide, ovulation usually takes place 11-14 days after the first day of your period). Given that sperm can live for 2-3 days, you need to use a barrier method for a good 5 days or so before your predicted ovulation date. And after ovulation, I'm careful for another 5 days or so, just to be on the safe side.

The good thing about being aware of your own fertility, apart from avoiding nasty hormone pills, is that when you do want to become pregnant, you are already aware of the days when you are most likely to conceive.

Now I repeat that nobody should base their own family planning on this information. But I do think that with a bit of knowledge about fertility it is possible to avoid taking the pill without losing too much spontaneity in the bedroom. If you are in a position where pregnancy is undesired but not unthinkable, natural fertility awareness is a realistic option. A bit of cervical mucous monitoring has to be preferable to that terrifying list of side-effects, doesn't it?

Less Breastfeeding = More Babies

There were some wonderful posts last week in honour of La Leche League's World Breastfeeding Week. The topic of this year's World Breastfeeding Week was "Prepared for Life" and lots of bloggers (including Cartside of Mummy Do That!, Edenwild and the Breastfeeding Carnival bloggers) wrote about the importance of breastfeeding in developing countries.

Here is another spin on why breastfeeding is so valuable to mothers in the third world. Breastfeeding suppresses a mother's fertility so that she is less likely to conceive another child soon after she has given birth. The high levels of prolactin in her blood caused by frequent feeding prevents conception by suppressing ovulation and making an embryo less likely to successfully implant in the uterus if an ovum does manage to get fertilised. Fertility returns slowly, and though lactation amenorrhea (cessation of periods whilst breastfeeding) lasts for over a year for some mothers, others will become fertile much more quickly.

The old wives' tale that you can't get pregnant while breastfeeding is not a myth - the "lactation amenorrhea method" (LAM) is even recognised as a method of birth control here in the West. If you a feeding on demand through the day and night AND breastfeeding exclusively AND not giving your baby a dummy or any other nipple substitute AND your baby is less than six months old then LAM is comparable in effectiveness to other birth control methods. But we all know someone who did get pregnant when they were breastfeeding - I know someone who was expecting their second child two months after delivering the first.

Luckily in the West we have good nutrition and healthcare and we can generally support two close-together babies. But in less developed countries with less plentiful food supplies, an extra mouth to feed can put a considerable strain on a family. Customs of carrying babies and breastfeeding them frequently have in the past prevented women getting pregnant too soon after having a baby, but in countries where bottle feeding has been encouraged, inter-birth intervals have been seen to decline. Meredith Small writes in Our Babies, Ourselves that the rate of pregnancy in Kenya has increased in direct correlation with the increase in formula feeding. Women in Kenya average eight babies in the lifetime, compared to only four in the more traditional !Kung San of Botswana. In fact Small even quotes another anthroplogist, R.V. Short, who went as far as to say: "The changing history of breastfeeding is the history of human population explosion."

My Fat Baby

Scene: a warm afternoon at the baby weight clinic.

Health visitor: "She's a little heavier than we would like her to be."

Me:"Oh?"

HV: "Yes."

Me: "Well she's still breastfed and she eats very healthily, just fruit and veg and a little bit of meat."

HV: "How many breastfeeds does she have?" (What kind of a question is this? How many breastfeeds does she have? Have people who ask this question got any idea of what on-demand feeding is like? So what counts as "one" breastfeed: the quick one minute burst in the middle of the night? The two minutes to calm her down when she's hyper? The ten-seconds-on-ten-seconds-off public feeds? This question has always puzzled me, from when she was newborn and fed all the time, to now when most feeds are blink-and-you'll-miss-it quick.)

Me: "Er, I have no idea. She feeds on demand."

HV: "Oh [looking puzzled]. She's obviously doing well on her solids. You could drop a breastfeed." (And which breastfeed would you suggest I drop? The one that comforts her when she's banged her head? The one that gets her to sleep for her nap? The one that guides her out of the fog of sleep when she wakes up? The one in the middle of the night that stops her fidgeting and moaning? The one she has on the evening when she's getting cranky, crying for me and pawing at my front? Have you any idea of the role breastfeeding plays in the lives of me and my baby? It is not so much about food as about mothering. And she is only eleven months old!)

Me: "Hmm. No, I'm not going to drop a feed. Maybe I could give her less solids."

HV: "No you can't do that. The solids are very important." (And what about the breastmilk? Is that not still protecting her against all manner of diseases? Is it not supposed to form the main part of her diet until she is a year old? Surely a breastfeed is worth more to her than an extra rice cake or half a potato, for example, especially given that she has no problems taking solids.)

Me: "Oh well. I'll do nothing then. I mean, look at her, she's perfectly fine."

HV: "Hmm. But she is heavier than we would like her to be."

Me: "Wouldn't you have to measure her height to see if she was in proportion?" (In fact we have measured her at home and she is in proportion. But she was born a skinny minnie, and now she's a big bouncy chubby thing, so she has failed to follow The Curve. So obviously there must be something wrong.)

HV: "Hmm."

Me: "Right, I'll do nothing then. Bye." (And I wish I could say that was the end of it, but that darned health visitor has planted the seed of doubt in my head now and for months I will be worrying about Cave Baby's weight, even though the rational side of my brain knows that there is not a jot wrong with her and the only problem is with our health service's draconian attitude to babies' weight gain. I do remember reading this post on Breastfeeding 1-2-3 about babies' weights, which made me feel better.)

Is this scenario familiar to anyone?

Why Do We Still Have to Prove Breast is Better?

It's time for another breastfeeding rant. Oh yes. I am totally behind the curve here, but it came to my attention that The Times and The Mail printed some poisonous anti-breastfeeding articles last week. God, how this annoys me. Newspapers are not exactly well known for their accurate reporting of scientific studies but they have really excelled themselves here. Breastfeeding not really any better then formula feeding? Pull the other one. Thankfully, UNICEF has issued a statement explaining why the negative reports on breastfeeding are guff. Only they won't print an article on that, will they?

I could go on and on about the proven risks of formula feeding: higher chances of respiratory tract infections, stomach upsets and ear infections; higher incidences of type II diabetes, leukaemia, eczema and asthma. And I could stress the benefits to a woman of breastfeeding: lower probabilities of getting breast and ovarian cancers. But that is enough about the proven benefits. Let's explain very simply why we know formula milk is not as good for babies as breastmilk.

What is formula milk made from? That's right, cows' milk. Milk that was lovingly crafted by mother nature to be perfect for a baby cow. We take the milk from the cows' udders, take it to a factory where we mess about with the proportions of proteins in it, add some vitamins and minerals, and hey presto! Formula milk. FORMULA MILK IS COWS' MILK. Picture a baby suckling from a cow. Is that really an acceptable alternative to breastfeeding?

And that omega 3 that formula companies are so keen to tell us about? That comes from fish scales and fish eyes. Yum!

Now, why do formula companies spend time and effort to improve their formula milks? Well it's really to get an edge over the competition. But to get an edge, they spend all that money trying to make their products more like breastmilk. Implicit in their advertising is the admission that breastmilk is the ideal. And why would you want to give your child second best if the ideal is sitting, literally, right in front of you, hanging off your chest?

I'm not upset at mothers who feed their babies formula. A few have to, and for their babies it is a life saver. Most are simply the victims of a culture that drip-feeds us the message that breastfeeding is weird from the moment we are born. It is the formula companies, and the media that print and broadcast their propoganda, that I hate.

If you are pregnant and reading this, think about whether you really want to gve hundreds of pounds of your own money to some greedy executives who are laughing because they have managed to convince you that chemically altered cows' milk is just as good as your own, free, human milk.

I might have strong views on this topic but I am entitled to my opinions and, as Noble Savage recently pointed out, those of us who breastfeed sometimes feel we have to defend our choices just like formula feeding mothers do.